Parenting Tips and Tricks- Secrets Reveiled.

(Like I said, I am moving on with life and blog posts. The puking has not stopped but a new fun of diarrhea has started. This will pass, this will pass. Thank you for all your love and support. I am coping with ice cream and Amaretto.)

When Hayden was a baby, I began to get these developmental surveys in the mail called, Ages and Stages. They would come every couple of months or so. There were certain activities to do with your baby and you would rate the child on how well they were able to complete each task; always, sometimes and not yet.
I completed each survey and then sent it back in for it to be scored. As a first time mom, I really like this. It was nice to have reassurance that Hayden was developing normally. It also came with things to do with your baby to help his/her development and different games and activities that would be good for his age group at the time.
Well since the triplets were preemies, they are also enrolled in this program. So every two months, I get 3 surveys mailed to my house and like a good girl, I fill each one out. And about 3 or 4 weeks later, I get the results and included in the result packet is a booklet called "Parenting the First Year."
I used to read every word printed when Hayden was a baby (what the heck did I know, nothing).
Now being a second, third and fourth time mom, I barely skim it over. But the other day, I actually read some of the things in there and it made me laugh. It is full of "textbook" advice that is no where close to do with real life. Here are some highlights and then what really happens.

(Disclaimer: What I am about the reveal are things that worked for me. I am by no means telling any one to do things as I did. You have to listen to your heart, read your own books and talk with your Pediatrician. Parenting is hard. You learn as you go and most of the time, make things up as you go. With that said, on with the post.)

"Babies this age (12 to 14 months) create clutter. Don't worry about it becoming a bad habit. You need to let them explore." No Shit Sherlock! Every cupboard open and emptied. All laundry baskets emptied of their contents. Every single toy box empty. They definitely have the exploring thing down. I have stopped picking up until the end of the day when they are all asleep. When Jeff gets home the house usually looks like a hurricane went through and I have stepped on about a dozen toys.

"Never leave baby alone in the car, even for a minute." I don't think that this rule applies to me, ever. I am sorry but there is no way that I am unstrapping 4 kids just to take them into the gas station so that I can pay and get a soda. I am gone less than 5 minutes. Deal with it.

"Self esteem begins at home. If you want your child to have high self-esteem, you have to help him feel good about himself. Point out at least five things that he has done right during the day. What? Point out five things that they are doing right? I am just trying to keep up with all the mischief that they create.

"It is still not a good idea to put stuffed animals or blanket the the crib with baby to sleep." I have to really disagree. My kids are blanket and stuffed animal kids. They have always had a blanket over them and a "lovey" by their head. Oh, and they slept and still do sleep on their tummies. I know it is not recommended but when I put them on their tummies, they actually slept. I am going to choose sleep every time.

"If baby is frustrated try to get baby interested in another activity or pretend to ignore baby by straighting up the room or washing dishes" Pretend? Pretend? I ignore every single fit and/or tantrum. Always have and always will. I will not be pretending to clean up either. I will be on the computer most likely blogging.

"Worrying about how much baby eats will only make you and her nervous. Don't expect baby to finish her whole plate or take "just one more bite". Let them be the judge of when they are full." I must admit that with Hayden, I was, as Jeff called me an Italian Grandma, always trying to get him to eat more and more, just one more bite. But with the babies, when its time to eat, they eat and whatever they ate was good. Sometimes it is a lot and sometimes a little. If they don't get full, too bad. They wait until it's time to eat again.

Well, that was the highlights from this month. I just turned in another three surveys, we will see what they have to say. Maybe next time, there will be something new.