Friday, August 8, 2008

You Asked and I Answered part 3

Here we go another and possibly the final installment of Q &A. Here is part one, and here is part two. In case you missed them.
Alright then, on with the fun. This set of question required some thought and reflections. I am putting a lot things out there, so be gentle people.
Warning: its kinda long. So get some snacks and enjoy.

Do your triplets seem to communicate with each other in a different way than other kids? (asked by scargosun)

My first response to this question was no. But I took some time an actually watched them play and interact with each other. They do seem to communicate with each other. They are very good at fighting with each other, that is for sure. While watching them, I discovered that Claire is like a little mother. She will call after the boys when they toddle away but she is also very good at playing the victim. Every time some takes a toy from her, she has a huge fit.
While they are playing together, they seem to be more vocal than other kids. They are always babbling something to each other. And they seem to understand each other. Who knows maybe it is a special multiples language.

How did you meet your Honey? (asked by Karen)

Jeff and I met through a friend of a friend. The story goes like this. My cousin, who is my best friend in the world, made a call to some of her friends and found out that they were all going to this concert at the Reptile Club. I was very naive and had no idea what was going on, so I was like sure, I'll go.

So most of you can probably guess what kinda of concert was at the reptile club; hard rock (you know "angry music" where the singer just yells into the mic) with a mosh pit. I had been introduced to Jeff earlier in the night and honestly never gave him a second thought. He was not my type; short, blond, blue eyes. No I went for the tall, dark and handsome, or so I thought.

But through out the night, he kept showing up every where I was. At first, I was very annoyed. But after he "saved" me from the middle of the mosh pit, I actually gave him some of my attention.

See, I had also met another boy that night, Sean. He was Jeff's friend and I thought that he was gorgeous. Totally my type, tall, dark and handsome. I wanted him to get to know him better. But Sean was to busy trying to get the attention of my cousin. This is a good thing because they ended up getting married, moving to Vegas and having a baby. See, life always works out.

Back to Jeff and me. So after the concert, we went back to this guy's house. It was late and I was getting tired and wanted to leave. But my cousin was my ride and she wanted to stay so I was stuck.

I laid down on the couch and tried to sleep until she was ready to go. I guess that I looked cold because Jeff brought over his coat and covered me up. Then he went down to the end of the couch and began to give me a foot rub.

From that moment on, it was all over. I was smitten. Unfortunately, shortly after my foot rub began, my cousin decided it was time to go. It all happen so fast that I forgot to get his number or give him mine. I was so sad. I really, really wanted to see him again. But a couple days later, I asked my cousin to ask Sean if he could get Jeff's phone number. It worked!

I ended up calling him the day before Valentine's day (2-13-1997). We talked for 2 hours and at the end of the conversation, he asked me out to a dinner and a movie. We ate at Boston Market and saw Scream (I know, I know but time was short. I did have a curfew. I was only 17 when we first met).

What are you most self conscious of? I only ask because you don't seem very self conscious at all - I mean you always seem very sure and confident in yourself and your decisions and who you are as a person and I have just always admired that about you. (asked by Diana)

First, I just want to say Thank you. That is such a nice thing to say. Second, this question has required some thought. I really was not sure how to answer it or if I was going to answer it at all.

To properly answer this question, I have to take you back to high school. *sigh* High school. This was not a good time in my life. You could not pay me enough money to go back. I am so glad that it is over.

You see, I went to a smallish high school. I was a very shy, overweight and awkward girl. I was not popular but I for some reason my "supposed" best friends were some of the popular girls. Most people did not know who I was. I was the girl that hung out with Mindy and Sindy (not real names. I don't know who really read this).

I was not into sports. I was not the best singer (or so I was told). I was not the right body type to get into the plays and drama club. I was on the debate team until Sindy total me that it wasn't a cool thing to do. I was plain Jen and boys never gave me the time of day.

But then one day around the age of 16, I got a job at a local restaurant. I wanted a car and my parents provided, one with the stipulation that I work to pay it off. So I did.

At this job, I met a boy. Now a first I had a total crush on this boy but our relationship turned into an amazing friendship (which we later ruin by going to far physically but that is another story). He like me for me. He listened to me and cared about my opinion. He laughed at my jokes. But most importantly, he made me feel worth something on my own. I was special for being me and not because of who my friends were or what I was interested in. This was when my self confidence first started to grow.

Over the course of that summer, I began to dread the start of school more and more and more. Until I just couldn't stand the thought of going back there. (First you must know, I believe that I have been blessed with the gift of wisdom. With some soul searching and prayer, I can usually find my way out of a problem) So I sat my parents down and told them that I was not going back to smallish school but instead I was going to attend large high school. My Dad was shocked and almost fell over.

After much talking and tears, they were on board. Next, I had to tell my friends. Sindy, I thought, was my one true friend. I thought that she really knew me. But it turns out, she did not. She could not understand why I was doing this? What would people think of her, how would it make her look? I tried to explain that it was not about her. It was about me. She said that she understood and that we could still be friends. That was the last time I ever spoke with her. She never called and never returned my phones. I was deeply, oh so deeply, hurt by her. I still carry the scar on my heart.

So that fall at the beginning of my Junior year, I started school at large high school. It was the most terrifying thing that I have ever done in my life. But at the same time the best thing that I could have done. I blossomed at that school. My senior year, I was editor of the school paper. I went to state in a vocal competition. I found that the study of the human body and nursing was my life's calling.

I did not meet/make a ton of friends but that is not what I was looking for (I have always had/wanted a few close best friends). At a very young age, I found myself! I learned who I was. I survived the biggest change in my life and became a better person. That is were all my self confidence comes from, knowing myself.
I believe that I would not be the person I am today, if I had not changed schools. It was painful but so well worth.

So to answer the question, no really. There is nothing that I am self conscious about. I mean, I feel a I could loose a few pounds, I deep down care what people think of me, I want to make people happy and so on. But I was so self conscious earlier in my life and it controlled my life that I will never go back to that place again. I can honestly say, I know who I am. I like myself and I am proud of the person that I have grown up to be. This is the best confidence booster around.

There you have it. A look into me. I hope and did not mean to offend any one but this is just how I can to be. I guess the statement be careful what you ask for come into mind.

9 comments:

Karen said...

Jen, this is my favorite post ever. I learned a ton about life and about you. Thanks for putting it all out there.

Kelly said...

WOW. What incredible insight and bravery you had as a 16 year old!
Great post!!

Aunt Julie said...

I totally believe that multiples like twins and triplets have their own "languages." My mom is a twin and I spent my childhood listening to Mom and my aunt finish each other's sentences. Sometimes, they don't even need to say a word to each other--each already knows what the other sister is thinking!

S Club Mama said...

Anthony & my first date movie was Alien vs. Predator. It was a free movie for us college kids. I understand the Scream thing.

Maternal Mirth said...

Any man who saves you from a Mosh Pit is sooo worth marrying :)

Missy said...

Wow, you were quite mature for a high schooler. That is a lot of insight for that age.
The story of meeting your hubby is fabulous! Just the fact that it was at a place called the "Reptile Club" where there was moshing takes the cake. And you were so young!
I enjoyed this series! If you get bloggers block again just ask us for more questions...

Nevada Marshalls said...

Did you really think I would let this go?...who called Jeff? Or did you forget to share the part of the story where you were to nervous to call Jeff, so I dailed his number and gave the phone to you, forcing you to either hang up or talk to the guy?! Regardless, it is a wonderful story and nice to hear as I had forgotten some of the details from that night we both fall for our husbands.

Jen said...

Thanks for the reminder I had forgotten that the phone call was actually at your mom's house. I owe you so many things thanks for that one too.

Gretchen said...

Oh, good thing you ended up with your sweetie but you are such a sucker! The way to a woman's heart is through her feet. ha ha ha And you, my dear, sound so amazing. Your self confidence is a lesson in life I wish I could teach my daughter. Your kids are very lucky.